Phonics - When Did Reading Get So Complicated?
If you didn’t grow up learning phonics, the whole thing can sound like a code-breaking mission from a spy film. One minute your child’s learning about a ‘digraph’, and the next you’re being told not to say “buh” for “b”. Welcome to modern-day reading instruction.
But don’t panic—this blog isn’t here to turn you into a phonics teacher. It’s here to help you understand what phonics is, why your child is learning it, and how you can support them at home without derailing the plan.
Wait, What Even Is Phonics?
Phonics is the method most schools now use to teach children how to read by connecting sounds (phonemes) with letters or letter groups (graphemes). In short: it’s how we crack the alphabet code.
Instead of starting with whole words, phonics gets right into the building blocks of language—sounds. Kids learn to recognise, blend, and manipulate these sounds to read and spell. Think of it as training wheels for reading: methodical, sound-by-sound, and designed to grow independence.
But What About the Alphabet?
This is where some parents get confused—understandably so. We grew up learning the alphabet song, reciting ay, bee, see, and being told “A is for apple” (even if we were saying “ay” instead of the actual sound “a”).
But here’s the kicker: phonics isn’t about the alphabet names—it’s about the sounds those letters make.
When your child is learning phonics, they don’t start by saying “em” for M or “ell” for L. Instead, they’re taught the pure sound—so “mmm” for M and “lll” for L. These are the phonemes—the building blocks of spoken language.
Knowing the alphabet names does come in handy later—especially for spelling, using a keyboard, or talking about capital letters. But if your child’s still at the blending stage, shouting “See! Ay! Tee!” doesn’t help them read the word cat. It makes it worse. They need the sounds: /k/ /a/ /t/.
So yes, the alphabet matters—just not yet and not in the way you might think. It’s like learning the lyrics to a song before you’ve learned the melody. Great info—wrong timing.
Why Can’t I Just Teach Them Sounds Myself?
Because it’s surprisingly easy to get phonics a bit… wrong.
One mispronounced sound (“buh” instead of a clean, clipped “b”) and you’ve accidentally made reading harder, not easier. Teachers follow a strict order and structure—schemes are designed with precision. Veering off the path, even with the best intentions, can confuse children and create more work for teachers later.
Leave the teaching to trained staff. But don’t check out completely—there’s still plenty you can do.
Skip to the Glossary at the end to read up on some of the terms used in phonics teaching.
Those Books in the Book Bag…
You’ll likely see two types:
Phonics books – These match your child’s current sound knowledge. They’re designed for success. The stories might not win a Booker Prize, but they’re there for blending practice—nothing more, nothing less. Think of them like the Biff, Chip & Kipper bootcamp.
Storybooks – These are rich, imaginative, and often too tricky to decode alone. That’s the point. They’re for you to read to your child. These books build vocabulary, comprehension, imagination, and a love of story. They’re just as important— never ditch them just because they “can’t read it yet”.
If phonics books are the weights at the gym, storybooks are the dance class—they both build skill, just in different ways.
What to Do With the Phonics Book
1. “If your child simply refuses to open the phonics book…”
Start by creating curiosity. You don’t need to beg, bribe, or plead. Just open it yourself and read it quietly, as though you’re having a private moment with it. Enjoy it — yes, even if it’s about a cat that sat on a mat.
Smile at the pictures. Point at something funny. Sometimes your child just needs to see you enjoying it. If they show even the slightest flicker of interest — take that as a win.
2. “If your child gives up after the first word…”
This is common. It might mean the book level is exactly right — they can read “and”, they just can’t be bothered to prove it to you again. Or maybe it was a fluke at school.
Either way, forcing them to continue will only make you the enemy — and worse, it’ll drain the joy out of reading.
Try this instead: close the book and say, “Let’s find out what happens next tomorrow.” Add, “I can’t wait to see what the next word is!”
Yes, even if that means returning the book a day later. The key is to keep the curiosity alive, not crush it under pressure.
And if all else fails, open the storybook, start reading, and pretend to get stuck on an easy word like “and”. Ask for their help. Suddenly they’re the expert — and that little role reversal can work wonders.
3. “They read so painfully slow I can feel my soul ageing.”
Every parent has been there.
But remember — if they’re sounding out and blending, they are reading. Not fluently, not smoothly, but reading.
So fake the enthusiasm. Praise every effort. And if you’re losing patience, grab your own book and sit beside them. Reading side-by-side helps normalise the pace — no stopwatch, no sighs.
Comprehension comes later. Focus first on sound knowledge and blending. Only once fluency builds does the magic of understanding click into place.
And here’s a key tip: after they’ve finished, you read it back smoothly. That’s how they hear what fluent reading sounds like.
This isn’t about memorising words or retelling stories — it’s about connecting the sounds they’ve learned in school to real reading success at home.
Is there a certain level they need to be in Reception?
Children don’t all start blending at the same time, and some will breeze through the early stages while others need more time. It’s not a race. It’s more like learning to swim—some paddle quickly, others take longer to let go of the side. Your job is to cheer them on, not rush them into the deep end.
Why All the Fuss About Phonics?
If you started school before phonics took centre stage in classrooms (which is likely if you were in Reception before the mid-2000s), you’re not alone. For many of us, learning to read meant memorising whole words, guessing from the pictures, and crossing our fingers. But research—and a growing pile of government data—showed this approach left too many children struggling later on, especially when it came to spelling, reading stamina, and understanding what they’d actually read.
In came systematic synthetic phonics (SSP), boosted by the Department for Education and championed by schemes like Read Write Inc and Little Wandle. These were designed to work for the majority, not just the confident readers. They prioritise pace, structure, and clarity—with measured results in mind. It’s not about guessing from pictures anymore. It’s about giving children the toolkit to read independently.
A Quick Look Back: How Phonics Took Over the Classroom
Pre-2000s
The Guessing Game Years
Children were often taught to read using a ‘whole word’ approach — lots of flashcards, picture clues, and a good deal of guesswork. Phonics existed, but it wasn’t front and centre in most classrooms.
Reading books? Yes. Knowing how the words worked? Bit hit and miss.
2004
The Big Phonics Wake-Up Call
A government review highlighted that too many children were falling behind in reading. Researchers pushed for a stronger focus on how children actually learn to read. Enter: synthetic phonics.
2006
The Rose Review
This major report by Jim Rose officially recommended that systematic, synthetic phonics should be the first and main way children are taught to read. In plain English: teach children to understand how sounds link to letters — and build from there.
2007 onwards
Schools Get the Message
Phonics teaching is ramped up in Early Years and Key Stage 1 classrooms across England. More training. More resources. More structure. If your child is in Reception or Year 1 today, phonics is probably front and centre every morning.
2012
Phonics Screening Check Launches
Every Year 1 child in England now takes a short check in June to see how well they can blend sounds and read words — real and made-up. It’s not an exam, but it gives schools and teachers a snapshot of how phonics is going.
What You Can Do at Home
Here’s the sweet spot: support without taking over.
Display new sounds at home (but only the ones they’ve already learned at school).
Use the school’s language—“sound it out”, “tricky word”, “blend it”, “Fred Talk” if you’re a Read Write Inc school.
Read with them and celebrate their effort, not just the accuracy.
Don’t compare levels or books with other children. Book banding colours are not Olympic medals.
And if you’re itching to help more, speak to your child’s teacher about how the scheme works. Some schools even offer phonics workshops—if yours does, go. I’ve run plenty myself for parents and I promise: no jargon, no judgment, just clarity.
A Final Word before the Glossary
Phonics isn’t a fad. It’s a structured, research-backed route into reading. But it’s also just one part of the bigger reading picture. Confidence, curiosity, conversation—those things matter just as much.
If you’re still feeling a bit unsure, start by asking your child’s school what scheme they use and how you can support their approach.
And if you’re looking for even more support around early literacy and phonics - our following parent-friendly resources give you the know-how. They’ve got the sounds. You’ve got their back.
Phonics Glossary for Parents
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The way kids learn to read now — by matching letters to sounds, not just guessing like we did. It’s like decoding a secret message, except the message is “s-a-t”.
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The tiniest sound in a word. Not a letter — a sound. So fish has three sounds: /f/ /i/ /sh/. Yes, English is weird like that. Welcome aboard.
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Fancy word for how a sound is written. Sometimes it’s one letter (like ‘t’), sometimes it’s two or three (like ‘sh’ or ‘igh’), and sometimes it’s just plain rude (like ‘eigh’ in eight).
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How your child reads a word: by squishing the sounds together until it clicks. /p/ /i/ /g/ becomes pig. Magical. Until they try it on knight.
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The opposite of blending. It’s what kids do when they’re spelling: pulling the word apart into sounds. Kind of like reverse LEGO.
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Two letters. One sound. Like the ‘ch’ in chips (delicious) or the ‘sh’ in shoes (expensive). They stick together and make a new sound — no divorcing allowed.
In Read Write Inc. they call them Special Friends (how adorable).
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Three letters, still just one sound. Like the ‘igh’ in night. A bit greedy, honestly.
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The digraph sound (e.g ae) is often the same even when they are split (into a-e).
When a digraph gets interrupted, like the ‘a-e’ in cake, the sound doesn’t change (we still say ay) but the spelling is what is affected.
Lots of other letters can sneak in between the split-digraphs now so it can be hard to spot. It’s sneakier than your toddler hiding under a blanket!
In Read Write Inc., these Special Friends have to be split-up due to their incessant chatting! As a result of the separations, they hold hands over the top. You might find your child drawing a loving arch over words.
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Words that give phonics the finger.
They don’t follow the main rules and rather fall under exceptions (sometimes because they stem from Greek, Latin, Old English or European origins). e.g ‘were’, ‘school’, ‘once’ (my least favourite).
You can’t really sound out ‘was’ or ‘the’ without ending up in tears — just memorise and move on. We all have our battles.
Tricky words are referred to as Red Words in Read Write Inc. (quite fitting really).
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Short, simple words that go Consonant-Vowel-Consonant — like cat, dog, mum. These are your child’s starter pack before things get spicy with ‘nightingale’.
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Books written using only the sounds your child has been taught. No surprise plot twists. No words they can’t read. Imagine flat-pack furniture instructions were like this.
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The levels in the phonics game. They usually go from Phase 1 to Phase 6. Sometimes they are colour coded. You won’t need to remember them all — just nod wisely and pretend you do.